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No matter what she tells you, first impressions matter. So why is it that the same guy who seemed so cute and charming when we met commits such major faux pas on that first crucial date? Save yourself from a similar fate with these tips.
If you can stay away from these first date mistakes you should make it to date number two. You're going to have to show your date that you're confident, and give a good impression without looking arrogant. The way you dress, the way you walk, what you talk about and your table manners are going to be under close scrutiny. First off you need to decide where to eat. This most likely is going to be up to you, so you have to get it right. Get this wrong and it will spoil everything right from the start of your date. Places to avoid are definitely fast food outlets. This will not go down well, and you'll be lucky if you're still on the date before you finish your food. At the other end of the scale you don't want to take a lady or guy on a first date to a fancy restaurant that is way out of your price range. For one he or she will think you've gone over the top, and two, you will be choosing all the cheapest items on the menu. You want a nice restaurant that is comfortable, serves good food and one where you can relax, not worry about the cost of the meal, and to be able to talk. It will be even more beneficial for you if you know the restaurant you're going to. You can order your meal straight away, and make your own recommendations. (Always impressive.) You will need to dress to impress. You don't want to turn up at a nice restaurant and look like you should be eating in a burger joint. Most women (or guys) will go out and buy something new just to look good for you so you need to make an effort. A shirt, nice pants and deceent shoes will be just right for the occasion. Back this up with immaculate personal hygiene like washed hair, no stubble and clean hands and nails. All this things will be looked at in the first 2 minutes of you meeting. Get this part right and your still heading for a good first date. Showing that you're not listening can be very aggravating. She will notice if your eyes are wondering around while she is talking to you. You need to show you are listening all the time. Throw in the odd question so she knows you're paying attention. Never look at another women while you're on your date especially the waitress. This will not look good for you. You need to put the blinkers on for the night, and ignore what's going on around you. Some things are best kept to yourself on your first date. In fact some of them can wait a few months before you start being too honest. Conversations to avoid are: ex girlfriends, any criminal offenses no matter how minor, medications you might be taking and generally anything that isn't going to sound good on a first date. She will have things that will be kept a secret as well in the early days, and that's the way they should stay. The Ill-Fitting Compliment Fact: When women take a compliment the wrong way, they take it as an insult. For example, if you say "Wow, you look great today," she hears an unspoken "...normally you look like hell." To avoid this dating disaster, eliminate all references to a particular time and place to your compliments (to suggest she always looks great). Bonus: Add "exceptionally" to your flattery and be specific. So, instead of "You look great", your smooth sweet talk would be, "That dress on you is exceptionally stunning."
Getting Touchy Yes, non-sexual touch is a good way to forge a connection. But, to avoid ringing the "dirty old man" warning bells in her head, avoid making a grab for her knee too early in the night. Let her touch you first, so you can get a good read on her interest level.
Name-Dropping
Don't bring up ex-girlfriends, platonic pals, even your mother. She wants to feel like the only person in the room, after all. There will be plenty of other dates to ruin your relationship with talk about how great your ex was or how close you are with your gal-pal roommate. Save that for date two.
Bragging Rights We know you boys are eager to impress us, but she'd rather discover what a great catch you are than have you explain it to her. To pique her interest enough to want another date, it's better to retain a little mystery. Mention your recent visit to Nepal, but leave out boasting your climb up Everest.
Talk about Sex Yeah, we know it's on your mind 24/7, but you want us to see you as different from all those other guys, don't you? Since you're letting her discover what a great catch you are, you have no need to drop hints that you're a real Don Juan. If you don't compromise her comfort level, she'll give you a chance to prove it to her later.
There are many more mistakes you could make on a first date but if you avoid these ones you should have some idea of what's not acceptable behavior. |